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Page 10


  Rowan met my gaze, his eyes piercing across the small expanse of table separating us. “We don’t allow that kind of activity, Kelly, if that helps calm your mind. We are pretty tight here. What would you do, if things don’t work out and we send you on your way?”

  “Thank you for that.” What would I do? I answered his question, as if his gaze commanded my participation. “We would keep going like we have been. Life hasn’t been terrible or even the worst it could be. We have each other and we’ve had fun. Our group does well together.”

  I glanced at John, his “good-job” smile reassuring my insecurity.

  Rowan nodded. “Okay.” He didn’t move his head but shifted his gaze from Bodey to John and then back to me. “What are your ages?”

  Bodey spoke first. “I’m twenty.” He hadn’t spoken much since Rowan denounced the importance of our marriage.

  “I’m forty-eight.” John didn’t even blink at the bald lie. Nothing on earth would make me call him out for it.

  Rowan locked his gaze with John’s who sat calmly by my side. Neither one flinched.

  The moment dragged on. Hardly anyone breathed.

  “That means you would’ve had Bodey when you were eighteen.” Rowan quirked an eyebrow, challenging John.

  Chuckling with an embarrassed flush on his cheeks, John nodded. “Yes. My wife and I made some poor choices in high school. Her parents chased after me and we got married about three months before Bodey was born.”

  John hadn’t met his wife until college. I leaned forward, cutting off the story-telling. “I’m nineteen.”

  Rowan shot a glance back to Ethan. I wanted to ask who he was so bad, but only because I needed to know how much power he had. I didn’t really care other than that.

  Turning toward a table I hadn’t paid attention to when I’d entered, Rowan held his face expressionless and issued an order. “Go ahead and restock your items and then we’ll talk more.” He waited for us to move toward the table.

  I stood first. Shyness didn’t exist in my world anymore. He offered to replenish some of my resources and didn’t mention if we were in or not. I wasn’t going to wait for him to go back on his offer.

  The table was a standard eight-by-four fold-down with a blue vinyl tablecloth. A varied assortment of items had been randomly placed on the surface. I started at one end, studying each thing carefully. While the temptation to take everything was strong, I also recognized John and Bodey hadn’t picked yet, and I didn’t want to have to carry everything. If Rowan didn’t let us in, I didn’t want to be stuck with so many items.

  A large roll of gauze caught my eye. We’d run out of first aid items about three weeks before. Not many people stocked those things, surprisingly. I picked up the soft light roll and studied the rest of the items. A small bottle of peppermint extract sat unassumingly beside a small braid of twine. The bottle fit my palm, the cool glass surface warming quickly in my grasp. Most people didn’t know the value of peppermint or mint of any kind.

  But I did and I wanted it.

  Turning from the table, I smiled at Bodey and John. Returning to my seat, I held up my items and said to Rowan, “Thank you.”

  He nodded. Bodey and John left for the supplies. Rowan leaned forward, his hands folded. “Can I ask why you chose those?” He pointed at my hands.

  I held up each item as I addressed. “We need gauze. I used the last one on a cut Bodey had a while back and the extract can do a lot of things we used to use medicine for – headaches, nausea, stuffy sinuses, all kinds of things. Too many to list, really. Is it okay that I took two?” Which would I choose, if I was only allowed one? The peppermint probably had more uses, but the gauze was invaluable when we needed it.

  “No, please, that’s actually very conservative of you. Why only two?” He tilted his head to the side, as if my answer could solve all the problems of the world. His interest puzzled me. I couldn’t grasp why someone who led an entire group would want to know what I thought. I didn’t feel manipulated, but Mom always said to question people and their motives and not to trust anyone. A very important rule.

  I didn’t like rules but they were hard to ignore. “It seems selfish to take too much. I know Bodey and John will get things to benefit our group and there’s no point in overloading ourselves, if you decide not to let us stay.” Shifting, I almost yawned, but contained the urge. I didn’t want to be rude. Fatigue would color my opinion on staying or going. Right then, I didn’t care one way or the other. I’d find happiness in another juice and laying my head down on the table.

  Glancing over my shoulder, I found Ethan watching me with Rowan. He met my gaze brazenly, winking at the last second. I flicked my gaze forward, flushing – and not in a flattered way. How dare he? He didn’t know me. I didn’t want to know him. There would be some serious anger, if Ethan wanted me to stay and had played a role in the games.

  Nothing about the guy was attractive, at least not compared to Bodey. He had too lean of a look, his shoulders the same width as his waist. I wanted to stand and run to Bodey’s side, hold onto his hand and mark myself as his in a stronger way than a slim ring did.

  Men didn’t see anything when it came to women unless they were claimed. Apparently even that might not work. I didn’t know. I’d never been claimed as someone else’s. I clenched my jaw. Would I be in danger inside, if I wasn’t claimed?

  Rowan watched the exchange. “Ethan’s my son. Good man.” His small smirk took me back, like he knew a secret I wanted to keep to myself. What? What secret?

  I was tempted to throw my items at him and run from the room, but I didn’t have any real reason to. He’d been upfront so far and hadn’t pushed Ethan on me.

  But he wanted to keep me there for Ethan. It couldn’t be more obvious when he glanced at Ethan as he made such a strong suggestion that I’d fit with a better man. Really?

  John and Bodey sat down with their items, breaking up my conversation with Rowan. John had chosen a small tool kit and duct tape. Bodey had chosen a hatchet and binoculars. All good choices. I was confident we’d be fine outside of the walls, if we needed to be. We’d rather not have to make it, but we could.

  Rowan glanced at their items as well, and then stood. He didn’t react beyond a slight nod. “I’ll be back in a moment. Please, make yourselves comfortable. There’s more to drink in the fridge and we have some homemade cookies on the counter by the sink in the room just that way.” He pointed off to the right at a small door which led into a closet-sized kitchen.

  Was he going to tell us if we were staying or not? Were we being let down easy?

  We didn’t move from our seats. Bodey reached out and grabbed my hand. “We’re okay, don’t worry. Everything is fine.” He leaned over and kissed my lips softly, the movement much more welcome than any attention from Rowan and his son.

  I appreciated his comment, his attempts to keep me consoled, but what if everything wasn’t fine? What if we were being shown the door because of the items we’d chosen?

  Swallowing, I pulled from his grasp and wiped my suddenly moist palms on my pants.

  For the first time since we’d been together, I didn’t tell Bodey and John my fears about staying. I didn’t want to ruin it for them. And a small part of me appreciated that I had more power than any male. Every second outside the walls, I was in danger of being raped or stolen by other men. To be inside where my choices mattered was more fulfilling than I could explain. If we could all stay together, then I would stay.

  Resting my hands on the table, I chewed on the inside of my cheek.

  Bodey reached out and took my hand again in his, but this time he twisted the band around my ring finger. Softly, without meeting my gaze, he asked, “Do you regret it? Us?”

  Sharply pulling my eyebrows together, I curled my fingers and pulled his hands closer to me. I waited for his eyes to raise. “No. Never. And just because they don’t see us as married, I still do. John has more authority than Rowan does as far as I’m concerned.”

>   He nodded softly and glanced at his dad.

  I didn’t know what was going to happen, so I didn’t offer my own reassurances. I didn’t know anything at that point except I loved Bodey and John and Rowan wasn’t going to take them from me.

  Chapter 10

  Fidgeting, I rolled the gauze back and forth between my hands. My dirt smudged fingers left dark marks on the white material. I tucked the roll into my pocket and focused my nervousness on the little brown bottle and its ivory label.

  Bodey glanced sideways at me and I smiled tightly. He didn’t need to know I was freaking out for so many reasons. Too many to list.

  Rowan returned to the room with his son in tow. Ethan stayed beside the door, taking up his guard stance and staring straight ahead. Rowan found his chair and removed his cowboy hat again – I couldn’t remember him even putting it back on – resting it on the table in front of him. His dark blond hair hadn’t budged with the hat going on and off.

  I crossed my fingers, hoping we would get invited in, hoping my childish ploy would help. If I needed to, I would jump on a crack or whatever the superstitions were. Anything to make our circumstances get better.

  “Well, I would like to offer you all a position in Freedom Pass. There’s a... social contract, if you will, we ask you agree to one-hundred-percent before crossing into the rest of the community.” He lifted his hand and ticked off on his fingers. “We already discussed the no-intercourse due to pregnancy possibilities but there’s a little more to it. We only have room for two-hundred people – this is dictated by carefully calculated science on the rations that we have, the electrical needs and other resources. This was not designed by me.”

  He dropped his hand. “Freedom Pass has been around since World War II when the U.S. detained citizens in camps. After the internment camps were no longer needed, they closed them. The late nineteen-nineties led to a reboot where the government gutted out the concentration camps and stocked them for the next World War.” Rowan opened his hands, palms up. I’d never heard of the government detaining people. Who would they keep in camps and why? Rowan continued. “We saw World War III come and go in a matter of months. These camps are being used all over the nation – well, what’s left after the bombings and the fighting. Leadership has changed hands, but overall, things have remained the way they were designed to be.”

  I sighed in disbelief. Of course a place like this would be created by the government, what else had they hidden? Many citizens had lost faith in the officials because they were more corrupt than gangs and common thieves.

  “We keep the population tightly controlled at two-hundred and everyone has a specific job or task which contributes to the community as a whole. We like to think of it as the community before the person. Each person is provided with food, housing, material goods, clothing, and even protection. All we ask is that some simple rules are followed.” He searched each of our faces to see if we followed along.

  “Work in the area you’re assigned. Follow orders and respect the hierarchy of the community. We’re not old enough or established enough to be a democracy. So the leader has final say in what happens or doesn’t happen. Once you’re accepted and you take on the conditions, you can’t leave. This is because we all depend on each other to accomplish our tasks. If someone leaves, it harms the group.” He smiled, his logic simple and easy to swallow.

  “Sounds like communism.” John twisted the head of a ratchet, the clicks slow, while watching Rowan explain the social construct.

  Rowan narrowed his eyes. Leaning back, he lifted a finger to his lips. After a long drawn out moment, he nodded slowly. “Okay, yes, I can see that. If you have to put a label on it, I would say that’s the closest. Except I would suggest we use the definition of the original Marxist theory and not the one that became the norm after the eighties. Contemporary communism doesn’t care if you contribute or not. Here at Freedom Pass, if you don’t contribute, you don’t have worth. We all work. If we don’t need you, then you don’t stay. It’s simple.”

  Simple and effective and with what they offered in exchange, I could see people dying to keep their spots in the very selective community.

  “I would like to offer you each a position here. We are making adjustments to have you fit in and your cabin will be ready shortly. There’s a holding room over there. Make yourselves at home until Ethan retrieves you.” He smiled and stood, nodding as he replaced his hat. “Please, remember what we talked about, Kelly.”

  Things had gone from okay to so much better than possible. I could even overlook the veiled threat in his final words.

  For a little while anyway.

  John cleared his throat. “Excuse me, Rowan?”

  Stopping beside the door, Rowan turned, his hat in his hand. “Yes?”

  “We had some friends come this way, a man and a woman – Mike and Mary Scoggins. Did they make it? In the last couple days?” John watched Rowan without turning. I’d forgotten about the Scoggins.

  Rowan shook his head, placing his hat and tucking it neatly upon his brow. “No one new for about three weeks, now. Sorry.”

  After all their sacrifice, the Scoggins hadn’t made it.

  What did that say about us?

  Chapter 11

  The bunkers resembled large gopher mounds from the outside with a door-well in the south facing side. On the inside, they were outfitted like an older style house including simple wood furniture, small energy efficient appliances, three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a kitchen, a family room, and a TV room.

  With a TV.

  Which worked.

  True, the programming wasn’t new, but according to Ethan who showed us around the house, we could borrow whatever DVDs we wanted from the library. DVDs. Seriously?

  Apparently there was a community library.

  Had I died? How had I been sleeping in the woods that morning and now stepping into a house with running water this afternoon?

  “You can shower, but water isn’t hot. We save the water heaters for sanitation in the medic clinic and in the dining area. But the water isn’t extremely cold anyway. You’ll want ice in your drinks to make them colder.” Ethan’s charm didn’t erase the creeping sensation his winking at me had created.

  But he’d mentioned a shower. A phenomenon I hadn’t experienced in longer than I could remember. I could forgive him his first impression, but I wouldn’t forget it.

  I opened the fridge door, a habit I’d picked up when we started checking houses. The lights never worked and they were either near-empty or filled with spoiled goods.

  Not this one.

  A small bulb displayed juice, milk, and pudding which had been organized neatly on the clean glass shelving.

  “There’s food in here. Is it ours?” I didn’t want to break any rules left unspoken and eat something I wasn’t supposed to.

  Ethan moved forward from his position by the door and peeked in the fridge. “Of course. You don’t have a lot of food items because all the food is rationed. We store it just off the kitchen area. You can eat in the cafeteria or have your food delivered here for each meal. People do both, but most eat at their homes.”

  Food was delivered? “How many meals? One a day?”

  He leaned toward me, his eyes taking in my outfit and searching my face. “No, Boss, three.”

  Three meals. Three full meals a day? And snacks? I couldn’t comprehend the idea. I huffed, “I’ll believe that when I see it.” I covered my mouth, shocked by my rude dare. “I’m sorry. I’m tired.”

  Ethan’s smile disarmed me. He leaned back. “You’d be surprised how many people react that way.”

  Bodey grinned, crossing his arms and resting a hip on the laminate counter. “Well, when food is the topic, I’m not shocked. It’s pretty serious.”

  “Yes, it is.” I smiled at my husband, grateful he understood where my attitude came from.

  Ethan cleared his throat, fixing his gaze on me like he tried getting his thoughts into my head, but failed mise
rably. He backed toward the door, arms held out to his side and at a slight bow. “Okay, so this is your place. Monica will be over in the morning to fit you for new clothing. We like to give bright new outfits for your placements. Did Rowan discuss your positions with you?”

  John nodded, rounding the corner from inspecting the other rooms. “Yes, I’m in mechanics, Bodey will be on watch, and Kelly has medics and inventory.”

  Ethan nodded. “Good. After your fitting tomorrow, you’ll head to your first shift. Bodey is on the graveyard shift for a while. Newbies always start there for a couple weeks. So you’ll start tomorrow night.” He inclined his head. “Okay, well I’ll let you get settled. Soaps and shampoos are in the cabinet under the sinks. Welcome to Freedom Pass.” He caught my gaze and held it longer than necessary.

  I was the first to break the connection. Yeah, creepy.

  Gratitude held my tongue – that’s all. He didn’t have the right to be interested in me, or act like he was. I’d declared myself married and my intentions to Rowan in front of Ethan. Just because Rowan didn’t approve or whatever that was, didn’t mean my loyalty would shift. I had a ring on. I hadn’t taken the ring off since Bodey and I had promised to be together. Had our world changed so much symbols of marriage no longer mattered?

  Ethan stepped out the front door.

  I turned to Bodey and John. A sinking ache in my chest didn’t make sense. I was delighted to be inside the compound, safe in a home with a roof and a bed and a floor without dirt. I swallowed, my throat constricting. “Is this our home now?” Why did I want to cry?

  John continued glancing around, like looking for flaws in the foundation or in the furniture. “I think so. Should we get settled and get some showers in?”

  Shower? A shower? I bent toward Bodey and squeezed his arm. “A shower? Oh, I’m so excited.” I shoved my claustrophobic sensation to the side. I hadn’t had a shower or felt really clean in so long. Cold water or not, I didn’t care. Water was water and he’d even mentioned soap and shampoo.